I'm the cat! HELP MEI blew it twice since my last post with wheat thins 10oz boxes… ugh, but it is like the way I deal with my emotional issues. I do really well for a time and then the compulsion hits me and today it was around fear of a situation my daughter is in and my grandbabies and I thought well, it will be OK. My husband got 3 boxes on sale and tons of candy and it is those that I have chosen twice this past week. Did really well over the holiday’s didn’t eat all the sugar and stuff but also didn’t take good enough care of my needs. I didn’t make myself special desserts so I could feel a part of. I wasn’t even tempted to eat all the sugar with everyone which was nice, but days later I get an emotional back lash. It is painful. Just wanted to write after my binge of almost the whole box so I can be raw and honest with how I am doing. I think the stall set me up for not trusting this food plan. I’m way too tired and I’m not sure if it is cause of all the emotions of this past year. So much illness and medication and then I’m extreme and just cut everything out all at once. I’m learning my way along this path. I love that I have a safe place to scream out to the world about this place. Last night on TLC was all these programs on morbid obesity, I’ve seen them before and I so relate with them. I’m not morbidly obsess but have the total ability to do so. I am really afraid and feel alone in this venture. It seems to be the biggest issue in my life since I was 5 years old and my sister was taken away from my family and put in an institution for the mentally retarded. I watched my mom turn to food, hide food, binge on sugar and I learned how to do this with her. Eat in secret. I would not have eaten this box of wheat thins today if anyone was around. I was not thinking I was setting myself up for this one. But I see how it happened and I can only be grateful that I can see it close enough afterward to write about it and express myself about it. I’m not doing good on my Atkins plan or low carb plan, but I know I have to keep trying, slips will happen it isn’t my plan it is just a disease I think, never really thought of it as a disease but I’m very dis-eased by this right now. I’m way over tired from the medication I’m on and need to taper off it also. I’m overwhelmed by my own life right now, but believe that I will get through it….
2 comments:
Hey Rene'
Be gentle with yourself sweetie. I really think the first thing you need to do is a "Clean" induction which means NO Chocoperfection bars, no nuts, no nothing :) Only foods that are on the induction list...not a single bite or taste of anything that isn't on the list. It will clean your body out and you'll lose the cravings I promise, but you have to do it by the book (doesn't that suck...lmao!!!). Here is a link to the foods you can eat
http://www.atkins.com/articles/atkins-phases/phase-one/acceptable-foods/
On Atkins website it will say that it is OKAY to eat his bars and drink his shakes on induction...IT ISN'T!!! If you look at the ingredients it has foods ingredients that aren't on the list. Dr. Atkins died and now the business is to make money off of the bars and shakes. Also, they cause stalls and terrible cravings (as I'm sure the chocoperfection bars do whether you know it or not). It's hard, believe me, I know it isn't easy sweetie, BUT it gets easier and easier and easier. I'm a binger and have always been a closet eater. I know how hard it is to fight that monster, but I know you can do it :)
Go look at the food list, try it, and try not to eat a single thing that isn't on it. After 2 weeks you add another cup of veggies, then you SLOWLY move up the rungs adding things like berries, nuts, grains and things. It takes time, but it's worth it!!! You're worth it Rene' <3
thank niki, much love to you, went through a huge withdrawl but much better now and doing good. had a big doctors appointment so will fill you in someday soon. How are you doing?
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